Week 4

What can make our marriages stronger?

We can help strengthen our marriages by remembering our reasons for getting married. Did we get married for tax purposes? To have more money by having dual income? To raise kids a certain way? To impress our friends with how great our spouse is? Probably not. In my case I got married because I love my wife and wanted to spend the rest of eternity together.

In the ensign article “Covenant Marriage” by Elder Bruce C. Hafen in November of 1996 he mentions 3 “wolves” that can destroy a marriage. The first is natural adversity, meaning things we can’t control. The second is our own imperfections, which are things that we do or say that we should all be working to correct but having them pointed out can drive a wedge between a couple. The third is excessive individualism. Which means putting ourselves above our marriage. These wolves will affect almost every marriage and to help prevent them from weakening it we should keep the reasons we were married in mind. Whenever I find my self in a fight over the ‘wolves’ mentioned I try and keep in mind that I didn’t marry her because I wanted to critic her, or blame her for our kids or lack of kids, or so that I could continue to live my life how I want without input from her.

I have only been married for a short time, but as with all marriage’s fights have happened over both small and large things. We have gotten through them by remembering that we are together because we belong together and not for a superficial reason. This makes it easier to look past the reason for the fight and helps us remember that we are married through a covenant with God and not a contract with government.